Flower of Pain
by Neffie K
Summary: Tonami has come to terms with his feelings for Sakura. Will his thirst for revenge overpower their potential future?


**The Flower of Pain**

Tonami walked down the empty halls of the high school. Everyone had left the building except for some students whom had extra curricular activities. Most of them were minding their own business and didn't pay him a second glance as he walked by.

He was used to being ignored – but this time it didn't feel bad. He knew he had changed from that little runt of a boy, and that he could now possess the popularity that had eluded him all his life.

Tonami didn't want the eyes of those insignificant students roaming the halls – though the attention was nice – he wanted _her_ to notice.

He stopped in front of an open window and rested his elbows on the ledge. Out in the field, some of the members of the soccer team were practicing. He buried his chin on the open palm of his hand and sighed.

His revenge plans were ruined.

Tonami had wanted to have a burning duel of hatred and competition with Sakura. He wanted to beat her at every single thing she had ever surpassed him in. Oh, he longed to simply blow her away.

All his efforts had produced were Sakura starting to like him. He didn't want to deal with those kinds of feelings. Tonami wanted vengeance, but he wasn't an asshole; he didn't really want to break her heart.

He knew however, that nothing would strike harder than that kind of death blow -- one of humiliation – which would completely defeat her in the end.

But it was a dangerous game to play.

Every time he remembered the moment when she had fallen against him – when he felt her light and vulnerable figure pressed against his toned body -- he kept getting goose bumps. He wanted so much to feel her slender form against his. He wanted to circle his fingers around her wrists and hold her back – kiss her and taste the lips that had hurt him years ago.

After that _incident -- _when he realized she was no longer the super strong girl he once feared -- he realized the love he had been trying to repress.

_She is so beautiful._

There were of course, other girls to like. Girls that were prettier or more feminine in manners, and that would flutter their lashes coyly at him, desiring to be embraced by his strong arms. There were girls that would be easier to live with than Sakura – girls that wouldn't contradict or challenge him – but he liked his flower the most.

In that moment he understood Arima, how even though he could have **any** girl in school he had chosen the awkward Miyazawa.

_Because she's special._

His thoughts of Sakura filled his every sense; from her smell, to her feel, to her voice. That voice he could recognize even after the years that had passed.

A voice that had taunted him...

A voice he never wanted to stop hearing...

He wasn't looking at the team anymore, although his eyes were on them. Images of his childhood flashed before him.

Tonami knew he loved her. That's why he wanted to grow out of being the "little fat kid," so he could come and sweep her off her feet. Then he wanted to strike her with the same sour indifference he had felt when she told him he was nothing more than a duty.

A responsibility she didn't want, one she abused... one she humiliated and ignored.

Her words rung in his ears like loud drums. "I was asked to watch out for you..."

But not to protect him or defend him – but to bully him... to mark him. While he loved her... she mistreated and took advantage of him.

Tonami realized he had always loved her, that he had always _wanted _her. Which was why he became the man he was.

His plans for revenge had altered. Now he wanted her to depend on him; to need him.

_To need me, like I needed you then..._

"Oi Tonami!"

He turned with eyes wide, "Yukino?"

She laughed at his reaction, "I didn't mean to scare you." She said smiling, "Do you want me to go?"

Tonami glanced beyond her towards Arima, his eyes glaring at him. As of late, Arima had become increasingly aggressive against him. There was no reason to be jealous, but apparently even the most wanted boy in school had his share of insecurities.

Tonami felt at a loss for words, so he shrugged. Arima would soon catch up to them, and he didn't want to deal with the testosterone collision.

Yukino pulled him by the arm, but he snatched it away, "Yukino, your boyfriend is behind you."

At this Arima's face turned red. Perhaps the dark haired boy had mistaken the statement. Tonami sighed, and turned, leaning against the window.

"Arima-kun!" Miyazawa affectionately cheered.

Tonami watched Arima's eyes shift to softness as they glanced at his girlfriend. It was amazing how quickly Arima's expressions could change; he was impressed.

"I have to go." Arima took Miyazawa's hand, gently pulling her towards him, "You promised we'd walk home together."

"That's right!" she said, wrapping herself around him, "And we're going to study together."

With his girlfriend now secure at his side, Arima turned to Tonami eyes slightly narrowed. He raised his hands up in peace, and offered, "Don't worry about me, I was leaving too."

Turning from them, he walked away.

Arima's attitude really bothered him, especially since Tonami always considered him a good friend. He let out a soft sigh as he made his way down to the gym, not realizing were he was headed at all. He was absorbed thinking of how he should fix the situation with Arima; he didn't want the guy to be his enemy for something as irrational as Miyazawa.

He snapped out of his musings when he bumped into someone.

Blinking a few times, he realized it was Sakura.

_Great..._

She looked up at him and tilted her head to the side with a frown. Tonami blushed softly, although it wasn't noticeable through his rich tan.

He loved it when she looked at him so intensely.

Sakura's frown slowly faded into a smile and then she started to laugh. It was his turn to frown, a familiar anger rising in him, making his hands fist at his sides.

She laughed her same taunting way of years earlier.

"What's so funny?"

She kept on laughing, "That this time you didn't hurl me when I bumped into you."

"I didn't mean to do that the other day."

"No?" Her expression turned serious. "I didn't appreciate that at all by the way. I'm **not** a basket ball."

Tonami noticed the steel in her voice. His scowl deepend, "What are you getting at?"

She smirked and walked away.

Tonami was getting sick of that reaction, so he snapped around and held her arm. "I asked you something."

"I don't intend to answer that question." She glared, "Now let go of my arm."

Tonami sneered, "So you want to battle still?"

"Were we in battle?" she asked sarcastically. "You know, since you're such a weak opponent, I didn't even realize that."

He tightened his grip around her arm, "Weak?"

"Weak and pathetic." she added staring at him straight in the eyes.

He glared at her, "We'll see who is weak and pathetic in the end!"

Tonami let her go.

"It's so easy to make you lose." She laughed, "You won't win."

Tonami closed his eyes, and shrugged, "The results will prove you wrong in the end."

"What game do you want to play?"

He sneered and didn't respond. It was his turn to bait her. He folded his arms across his chest and cocked his head to one side, watching her fierce expression.

"Basketball?" She asked, "Volleyball?"

"You're thinking too small."

Sakura arched her brow, "It better not be what I am thinking."

"Why not?" he asked. "Afraid to ruin your macho-chick reputation?"

Her eye twitched, "How dare you call me that!"

She raised a fist to land a punch on his jaw, but he easily held her wrist back before she could even blink. It felt good to have the power.

"I am stronger than you."

He could feel her shiver. A spasm of pain marred her pretty face. She was trying to act tough, but he knew that his grip was hurting her.

"Maybe you are," she admitted. "But in the game you want to play, physical strength has nothing to do with it."

"True," he nodded. "But maybe even then, I am stronger than you."

Sakura stared into his eyes as if realizing that he was indeed the same Tonami she knew. He could see her mentally slapping herself for feeling attracted to him.

"So you remember, huh?"

She bit her lip, "Do you hate me that much, Tonami?"

He was still holding her, but the grip loosened at her question. She could be so dense sometimes. In a moment of impulse, he leaned down and brushed his lips ever softly near the corner of hers. He trailed them up towards her ear, taking great satisfaction in the tension and sudden heat of her body. He loved to see how much he affected her.

"Do I have reason to hate you?" he whispered.

One of her hands weakly pushed at his chest, and he relented moving away. He watched her eyes run over his body, his face, his hair... did she make the connection that before her stood none other than the fat little rich kid?

_Yes, Sakura... it's me. _

In his mind he was telling her whom he was, but his heart still ached. Revenge hadn't made him feel any better. He sighed letting go of her wrist. Why did he even bother?

"Sakura."

She looked up into his eyes, "Mmmm?"

"You have realized it..."

"What are you talking about?"

_Maybe I gave her intellect too much credit..._

He turned to leave, "Nothing."

"Tonami!"

He stopped immediately, but did not turn to face her. "What?"

"I don't want to compete with dirt under the rug."

"What do you mean?"

"I know you are the same Tonami from Jr. High." she said.

He turned around now, eyes narrowed. "When did you realize it?"

"A while ago."

"When?" he pressed.

She looked away, "When you pushed me off of you."

The bitterness oozed out of his mouth, "Why didn't you confront me?"

"Why didn't you!" she countered.

There was silence.

Neither of them spoke as, their eyes narrowed at the other.

The breeze blew lightly as it usually did in the afternoon. They stared into each other's eyes; anger, frustration, and bitterness mixed with love. Those were plain emotions filling the gap between them.

They had to talk about what had happened before the bitterness overpowered the love.

* * *

_Based on the anime, not the manga._

Ver. 2.0

* * *


End file.
